Posts in Columns

Quitting Instagram for a while

I’m going to quit Instagram for a while, at least until the new year. Maybe longer, depending on how I feel. Why? Short version: Instagram is giving me too much negative energy in a time where I desperately need positive energy. Long version? Okay, here we go…

Since 1.5 years I’m not doing well, physically and mentally. During this time of uncertainty, one thing did become certain: the way I use Instagram is not inspiring, motivating or healthy for me anymore. 


I was recently diagnosed with a somatic disorder: “A mental disorder that manifests as physical symptoms, but cannot be explained by a medical condition.” 

Because I’ve never been able to deal with emotions and stress properly, my body expresses it through chronic fatigue, muscle pains, vision problems, and abdominal issues. 

The symptoms aren’t fake. The fatigue and pain I struggle with are real and cause a lot of distress, but the cause is simply mentally. Well, “simply”… there’s nothing simple about mental illness.

I have to learn to let go of my defense mechanisms and allow the emotions I’ve worked a lifetime to repress. Next to (re)experiencing past and present pain, I have to come to terms with how these experiences made me who I am. Someone I don’t necessarily always like. And the Insta-perfect world isn’t helping me like myself more, nor is it helping me realize that it’s normal to struggle.  


During this time of working on myself, I need to focus on things that are really valuable in life. Real things. Real love, real support, real connection, gratitude, a safe home, nature, music, art. Not things that social media makes me believe I need in order to be happy or satisfied. Like clothes, Instagram likes, a perfect apartment, exclusive events, an adventurous life or countless coffee dates with random people. 

I know it’s not Instagram, it’s the way I react to it. But at this point, I’m not capable (and maybe never will be) to beat that primary reaction of feeling insecure and unsatisfied with myself and my life, when seeing other people’s perfect lives.

Next to feeling insecure, I feel pressured. I am a fashion influencer, which means I earn money by promoting fashion brands through my outfit posts. The constant pressure of having to post photos that will score in order to keep both you – my followers – and my (potential) clients pleased is exhausting. And not good for someone like me, who already feels like she has to constantly prove her worth to others.


I feel a bit hypocrite writing this. I am an influencer who’s life probably looks perfect to you. And that’s exactly why I want to be open about this. I always thought I was one of the few who suffered from mental illness. Until I opened up about it and discovered that almost every person I know is dealing with or has dealt with mental health issues. I felt relieved, connected and less ashamed and alone, and I hope this little story makes you feel the same way. Even if it only removes one of the million rocks you feel laying on your shoulders.  

I once saw an Insta-post saying “Be the change you want to see on your feed.” This is a first step. Maybe I will focus more on this when I’m back, maybe I’ll continue sharing my daily looks. Maybe a bit of both. We’ll see. 


I’ve decided to delete the Instagram app for now, so there’s no temptation for me. That makes it sound like an addiction. Well it is, a self-destructing one. When I pick up my phone, my finger automatically moves to that spot on my screen where the Instagram app is located and I unconsciously end up looking at other people’s lives for hours, instead of dealing with my own. 

So if you want to talk, know that I won’t be reading my comments or DM’s after today. Feel free to email me at Though if you’re really struggling, best would be to contact a friend or family member, or even better; a therapist. The only reason I can explain my situation so clearly is because of my therapist. Without him, life would still be a big maze in which I’d still be taking the same wrong turns. It will be a long time until I reach the end of the maze – if I ever fully will – but at least the paths are slowly getting clearer. 

Either way, I’m here for you, as you guys are there for me too.

See you in the next year ♥︎

Never judge a book by its Instagram page – Health update

Dear followers, friends, brands, pr-agencies, people I was supposed to meet or drink coffee with ages ago, I would like to explain myself by sharing a personal update on my health.

Over the past 7 months, I’ve already informed a lot of people, but I understand it can be confusing when you see photos of a – what seems to be – happy girl on Instagram. You’re right, I don’t look sick. But please remember to..

never judge a book by its cover, or in this case by its Instagram page.

My Instagram is all about fashion, which is only a tiny part of my life. But it’s an important part of my life and being able to share this passion with so many people is amazing. The fact that social media and content creation eventually became my job is also amazing and I don’t want to lose my beloved job.

Being able to work, even if it’s just a little, makes me feel worthwhile, useful and less of a patient. So during my good days, which I fortunately still have, I try to create content and schedule posts in advance, so I don’t have to worry about this when I’m not feeling well.

My Instagram is about fashion and therefore my content is a reflection of my style; not my personality, my life or how I’m feeling that day.

So what’s wrong?

March 2018 I started to feel really tired. I figured I had a burnout, so I started to take things slow. But the symptoms only got worse. It got to a point where I was constantly so exhausted I couldn’t keep up with life. I can only do about 30% of the things I used to, the other 70% I’m on the couch or in bed.

My lack of energy has made it hard to work, to do things that make me happy and to meet with people. It makes me feel insecure, useless, sad, isolated and lonely. The fact that my family lives in The Netherlands isn’t helping either. Though I’ve met great people in Sydney, I don’t have a really good friend I feel comfortable enough with to call when I’m down. It takes time and energy to build those kind of relationships. Time I have, energy I don’t.

Luckily I have my boyfriend, who’s been an amazing support.

Iron deficiency

Eventually, I got depressed and anxious, so I went to the doctor. It seemed I had severe iron deficiency, which can cause extreme fatigue and even anxiety. After 3 months of no results from daily iron supplements, I had an iron infusion 3 weeks ago. I was excited to soon be the old happy and energetic Lian again.

Unfortunately I felt even more tired afterwards and I started having pain in my legs. So bad that I have trouble walking and standing. After a few blood tests, it seems I have hypophosphatemia; an abnormally low level of phosphate in the blood. It’s beyond the point of solving it with food or supplements.


Hypophosphatemia is very rare and can be dangerous. The common causes of hypophosphatemia are not applicable to me, so it’s unclear what’s causing this. My doctor referred me to a kidney specialist. She told me that if something unusual happens with my health in the meantime, I immediately have to go to the hospital.

Since the cause is unclear I’m not on treatment right now, so it’s a nerve-racking wait until the kidney specialist figures out what’s wrong. This is all leaving me in an anxious state. I don’t know what’s wrong, whether it’s easy to cure, whether it’s something bad or how long it will be until I’m better. And it’s already been 7 months.


I’m trying to keep Instagram going as much as I can. I scheduled a couple of posts before I heard the news from the doctor last Thursday, so you’ll still get your doses of outfit inspiration even though I’m not in the best shape right now.

I hope this clears things out for everyone that I’ve disappointed by not replying or canceling/declining invitations. I also hope this shows that

what you see on social media is not necessarily a reflection of someone’s life.

A Dutch fashion girl doing farm work in Australia

Yup, that’s me. You thought I was talking about someone else huh? No, I’ve been working and living on a farm in the Australian country for 4,5 months. Pause for reaction…

Rick and I arrived in Sydney on a one-year Working Holiday visa. A so-called 417-visa. To extend our stay as foreigners, Dutch people in particular, we could try to get sponsored by an employer or do 88 days of farm work. We never really focused on getting sponsored, so we choose to do 88 days of farm work. Well, to say we choose makes it sounds as if we were totally fine with this option, which definitely wasn’t the case. I was dreading it to the fullest!

Dreading farm work

First of all, farm work itself isn’t appealing to me at all. I’m no stranger to working hard, but fiscally hard work? Literally getting my hands dirty? Not familiar with the concept. We’ve heard horror stories of backpackers having to pick fruit 14 hours a day for 2 dollars an hour. It’s a fact that a lot of farmers take advantage of travelers that are desperate to get their second-year visa papers signed. The government has taken steps, but it’s still a common thing to get screwed over by farmers.

We made the conscious decision to not apply for fruit picking jobs in the popular states where there are tons of backpackers, like sunny Queensland, to increase our chances of getting a good paying job at an honest farmer, #TIP! We ended up working at for a great farmer at a potato farm in Victoria.

Leaving the city we love

The second thing I wasn’t looking forward to was living in the country. You’re not allowed to work on a farm near the bigger cities and therefore farm work is also known as regional work. I know people who would love to live in the country, being surrounded by nature and quietness, but I’m just not one of those people. I’m a city girl and I loved my city life in Sydney.

Not just because of the city itself, also because of the people we met, friends we made, the house we made our own those amazing first months in Australia. For the first time in my life I truly felt at home and after just 7 months I was supposed to leave that behind already? I literally cried when we drove out of our suburb Newtown that first weekend of April.

Next to leaving our house, friends and the city we love so much, we didn’t know in what type of house we would stay. In most cases farmers provide accommodation, but just as payment, it’s known that farmers screw over travelers on accommodation too. We didn’t know where or with whom we were going to end up, and I was really uncomfortable with that.

Fashion shoots on a paddy next to a cow?

Another thing that worried me was how I could keep my online business going. How the hell am I supposed to create fashionable content when I live in the middle of nowhere? Am I supposed to pose on a paddy next to a cow? Might be fun for 1 post, but what about the other 120 posts? And if I do find a way, will I even have Internet to actually post it? I was really scared I would have to shut down “the business” for 4 months because creating content and sharing it online is what I love to do.

I was lucky to find ways to create content and I’m extremely thankful for having three dots of 4G signal every day! There are a few villages about a 20-40 minute drive away and we’re “just” 2 hours from Melbourne. So I was able to keep my business going without anyone knowing about my life on the farm. And that made me really glad because I was actually ashamed of my situation.

Ashamed of my farm life

Though I would like to think I’m way too down to earth to go along with the ‘life has to be perfect’ trend we see on Instagram and Facebook, it gets to me too. You all know me as this fashion girl living in the big city; how stupid will I look if I share stuff about my crappy life on the farm? I mean there’s absolutely nothing wrong with farming – I actually gained great respect for people doing this 24/7! – but it’s not really fashionable and it makes my life look everything but perfect.

In the end, I’m actually more ashamed of not wanting to share it, then I am for sharing it now. Because I think we shouldn’t just share a perfect picture, we should also share our struggles. Nothing worth having comes easy and that’s just the way life is. Yet with social media nowadays it looks as everything does come easy. People share photos of their amazing travel adventures, their newest designer bag, their coolest cars and their beautiful house(s) as if it’s normal.

Some people are just lucky but most of us have to work hard, step outside our comfort-zone and do things we don’t want to do, to eventually get closer to our dreams. So if you ever feel like you’re the only one having to struggle while everyone else is leading the perfect life, you are not! We all go through things that suck, sometimes without even knowing why we have to deal with it, but eventually, you’ll get closer to your goals. Not by sitting at home, but to work hard and doing things outside of your comfort-zone, cause that’s the only way to move forward.

Wouldn’t have wanted to miss this experience!

When we left Sydney in April, I wish I could just snap my fingers and travel 4,5 months forward in time. In the end, I am really thankful magical things like that aren’t possible because I wouldn’t have wanted to miss the past 4,5 months. Yes, it wasn’t the ideal life, but it wasn’t as bad as I expected. The past 3 months were actually the best months I ever had business-wise! Who would have known that would happen?!

But most importantly, I grew as a person from this experience. The pessimist in me has learned how to turn a shitty situation into a good one, by accepting it and making the most out of it, instead of constantly fighting it. Fighting things you have to go through is the toughest fight you’ll ever have. In the end, I handled the past 4,5 months like a boss and I’m really proud of myself! And being truly proud of myself is also a very new, yet great feeling.

Share your struggles!

I would like to challenge you to share some of your life struggles too, as I think we shouldn’t just share perfect pictures or perfect stories. Let’s comfort each other by sharing something real. I’m not asking you to share a very personal or depression story, but just something others probably can relate to. Like that time you had to move in with your parents because you decided to finally get that degree you’ve always wanted and started college again as a 40-year-old. Or something like that 😉 I’m looking forward to reading your comments!

As for my story, we got our 88 days of farm work!!! We’re going on a well-deserved holiday in a few days and while being overseas, we’re going to apply for our second-year visa. I’ll keep you posted!

When flawlessness isn’t so flawless – a column about makeup

One thing not so cool about traveling; your skin doesn’t know how to handle the sun, salty sea water, chemical swimming pool water, dry air, humid air… My forehead has always been my problem area, and she and I haven’t been good friends lately. Follow my vlogs? If you pause it every now and then, you can do a fun game of pimple counting. They’re right between my brows and my hairline. Good luck!

It was better when I had my Bali tan, but now that that pretty brown glow is gone (thanks Sydney), my forehead is behaving bad again. Of course it has to do with my diet and skin care as well, but I eat healthy, try to drink more water and just bought some new skin products that are helping. But I also got some new make-up products to do a proper cover-up.

I’m a beauty disaster

Because I’m a bit insecure, I’m quite skin and make-up focussed at the moment. So when I’m doing my daily Instagram feed check now, I don’t just look at outfits, I look at faces. And damn, so many girls look flawless! How do they do it?! To get an answer to that question I go to YouTube.

Just so you understand, I’m a beauty disaster. I don’t know how to work make-up and I don’t know what’s good for me. Some things even scare me, like contouring and lip-liner. I’ve got a few items that feel and look good, and I stick to it. Like my Clinique ‘Even Better’ foundation and Chanel ‘Le Volume mascara’, hallelujah.

My skin starts itching looking at these videos

But now that I want to know a bit more about beauty, YouTube comes to the rescue. Thank you youtubbers, for all those ‘Every day skin and make-up routine’ videos! A lot of Instagrammers also do videos and lucky for me, they also do a lot of skincare and makeup videos. But instead of making me wanna get out my new make-up, they make me wanna throw it out. The amount of foundation, concealer, bronzer, highlighter, blush, eyebrow powder, fake lashes and lip-liner (wow, I do know some beauty words!) is just shocking to me. How can that feel comfortable? My skin starts itching just looking at these videos.

The sad thing is, these girls are so pretty when they start the video without make-up. Okay, a little foundation, blush, mascara and eye-brow stuff makes them look a bit more flawless, but so many girls continue putting stuff on their faces when I thought they were done ten minutes ago. I’m sorry for being harsh, but very often I look at it and think ‘Don’t you see you’ve got stripes of makeup on your face?’. So many girls literally use their face as a canvas and just like Van Gogh (or any other Impressionist) hardly blend out the lines. Or is that the point and do I just don’t get it? I personally wouldn’t like to walk around with a dark brown stripe under my cheekbones, but that’s just me.

Who wants to wake up to a different looking woman?

I realize that I’m blessed with good skin (except for that forehead!) and that I’m blessed with a boyfriend who thinks I look my best with just a little mascara on. I know for a fact that many men feel that way and I totally understand. Who wants to wake up to a totally different looking woman?

I also realize that some girls really have something to cover-up that makes them insecure when they don’t. Just as I bought new makeup, now that I’m having troubles with my skin. I get it and I’m not anti make-up. But I think makeup should be used to cover-up flaws and to emphasize your plus points. Not to create a totally different face. Or in some, not so rare cases unfortunately, a clown look. I’m sorry, but I’m also not sorry.

Cover-up & emphasize

The point of this column is not to be mean to women who love make-up, it’s not to make fun of women who use make-up. It’s not that I’m becoming the next Alicia Keys and stop wearing make-up to make a statement. The point is that we all compare ourselves to it-girl on social media, but sometimes when you look closer (or at their YouTube tutorials in this case) they’re flawlessness doesn’t come as easy as you might have thought. We all have flaws we want to cover-up, we all have plus point we could emphasize. And I hope that in the end that’s what most of us will do when using makeup!

Photo by

A new start: From Fashion Hoax to Lian Galliard

Four years ago I published my blog with one simple click, not knowing that today it would be my job. I’m very thankful for all the wonderful encounters, trips, events, nominations, features and collaborations Fashion Hoax has brought me.

Despite of all the amazing things I’ve accomplished as a blogger, I still am a true Fashion Hoax: to me there’s more than just fashion. I realize that more and more now that I’m getting older (the big 3-0 is around the corner!) and now that I’m traveling. But what I realize most is I blog according to what is expected from the so called fashionblogger, instead of blogging about what’s really happening in my life. And I lead a pretty awesome life, if I may say so myself, as I left my home behind to travel the world for an indefinite period of time. At the moment I live in fashionable Sydney.

So now what, no more fashion?

Will you not be blogging about fashion anymore? That will never happen, fashion is my thing. It has been ever since I tried on my mothers clothes as a little girl for the first time. And today I still love the dress-up parties I have every morning.

But next to fashion I also love traveling and writing. I’m sort of a little Carrie Bradshaw, minus 50 pairs of Manolo’s. They wont fit in my backpack. And let’s not forget that I don’t have the money for it..

I want to blog about what I like and a first step in the good direction is a name change: From Fashion Hoax to Lian Galliard. That’s me btw, hi! will be filled with columns about thirty-something female problems, travel tips and travel stories, and good old outfit photo’s. But also random ‘Pic(k)s of the day’ without further explanation. Just because I can on my own personal blog.

She’s crazy! Is she?

Some people might think this is the stupidest thing I could do, for me it’s something that finally get’s me excited again. Pushing the ‘Publish’ or ‘Share’ button is so much more fun when you put something online that you truly stand for. And if other people like it as well, well that’s just awesome!

Sunday column: How do surf chicks keep looking good on the board?

If you expect an answer to his question, click away this page. This is not a ‘How-To’ article, this is a true question. So answers are very welcome!

After three surfing sessions I can hardly call myself a surf chick, even though I did stand on the board several times. My first wave I was actually on it more than five seconds and won my bet to Rick. Though he thinks I didn’t win, because the next wave (his first wave) he was also on the board for more than five seconds. We eventually compromised: I won this bet because Rick is always better at sports.

So I’m a surf chick to be. I like surfing and I feel good when I do it, even though I kind of suck. After this column is done, we’re gonna go back to the beach to rent a board #fanatic.

Yes, I’m excited about the first sport I really like. So excited, that when I walk into the ocean, the fashion girl inside of me disappears. Not by choice! You can hardly look good when you’re in the ocean. Well, maybe when you’re floating on a board in your perfectly cut-out swimsuit, trying to capture your perfect next instagram photo. My opinion though is that a lot of surf chicks look kind of fucked up during the sport. The good kind of fucked, the I’m-totally-into-my-sport kind of fucked up.

Hello butt crack!

Here in Bali my hair bun gets flushed out by a wave every 15 seconds. After an hour I’ve got a lost elastic hanging somewhere in my hair and the other locks are stuck to my wed face. My red, burned face I might add. The sun loves bare skin spot on the open sea.

Next to the hair, the waves also love to flush my face, including nose and mouth. Although I find it embarrassing to blow my nose in public, during surfing I blow my snot right into the water without a handkerchief or a hand in front of it. Same goes for my saltwater spit.

And then there’s the bikini bottom. Don’t expect it to stay in place when you’re trying to catch a good wave or when you get wiped off your board. Everyone at Kuta Beach has seen my butt crack by now. In between the waves there’s just no time to pull my bottom out of my butt cheeks, no time to put my bun back together and properly dispose of my snot. What if a wave flushes me away or worse, I miss out on a great wave! Told you I was a fanatic.

But there’s one beauty-thing I really hate about surfing: Your hair gets wet every day. I love my thick hair, but it’s not that typical beach girl hair that looks even better when spending a day in salty water. ‘Salty hair, don’t care’ my ass. I’m not the type that washes her hair once every two weeks (yuk), but to was hit every day? Having to blow-dry and curl/straighten it again? Not good form y bleached hair.

So ladies, let’s go with those tips!


Sunday column: The unexpected ‘Yes’

Exactly one year ago Rick and I had our first date. Read the story of our first date here. A first date of one hour, one hour that would eventually change my life. Because of this anniversary, I’m sharing a column that I wrote a few months ago, when I was in my head-over-heels state. And the great part is, I’m still head-over-heels in love with Rick!

When you’re a woman who has passed the age of 25, you’ll get asked the inevitable question: Do you plan on having children? So I was asked again the other day. Especially when everyone around you is walking around with a big baby belly, and you’ve only got so much as a little muffin top, every one want to know if you’re busy. Oh, I’m busy alright, but my goal in the act is an orgasm, not a child. Shall I just throw that one in as an answer the next time?! That will shut them up.

Anywho, everyone is popping out babies around me like it’s nothing. My best friends brother just became a father for the first time, my stepsister just became a newbie mommy, hell, my nephew and colleague’s son were born on the exact same morning a few months ago! Now the loaded question gets asked even more. Loaded question? When the answer is not YES I WANT KIDS it’s a loaded question, believe me.

The first time I was asked, I was still with my ex. What happened next had something to do with a blushing face, an awkward answer (“I don’t know yet”) and an uncomfortable glance at the man I should have children with within a couple of years. A sweet man who would definitely be a great father and who wanted to be a great father. Deep inside though I knew I didn’t want to be a mother. Now I know I didn’t want to be the mother of his children. And that’s a big difference.

Children? Neh, too busy Tindering

A little over two months ago I had a short spontaneous date with a man I was randomly ‘Tindering’ with. I prefer tindering over bearing, thank you very much. While I was busy extending my contact list at that time (meaning: collecting phone numbers of potential fuckbuddy’s), I met the man that would change everything.

We were both dating other people, we were both not looking for anything serious. Well, we came back from that one. We both had never been so in love in 28 years. ‘That that could still happen at the age of 28’, we’ve said to each other about 28 times. After two weeks Tinder was deleted, after 4 weeks we were officially exclusive and after 7 week he whispered ‘I love you’ in my ear at his mothers house. Resolutely I whispered ‘I love you too’ back.

Last Sunday we got to talking about cartoons. Of course he likes cartoons as much as I do. Before I knew it, an uncontrolled sentence I’ll never forget flew out of my mouth: “So you’ll wake up every Sunday morning with our kids to watch cartoons with them?” And all of a sudden I saw the three of them sitting on the couch in their pajamas. Daddy in the middle with his arms around two curly headed cuties, sleepy staring at the TV. The feeling I felt was the same feeling I felt when the man in question told me he was in love with my for the first time: butterflies.

Hold up, what?! Lian, you don’t even want kids! And mostly: Lian, you’ve only known this guy for two months! In one millisecond these thoughts came to mind and in one millisecond they disappeared when he smiled and said: “Yes, me in my onesie and them in their koala pajamas, haha!”

Tick-tock, gotta go, my biological clock is ticking!


How Instagram likes make you forget what you really like

Why do I feel like shit now that I’m leading the perfect Instagram life?!

Ever since we started our travel adventure I realize more and more that I’m too Instagram-focused. I’m so focused on taking the perfect picture, I’m not truly experiencing what’s happening around me. A cute coffee place is not a place to enjoy a cup of coffee anymore, it’s a potential Instagram picture. A white-sand-and-blue-sea beach is not a place to relax anymore, it’s a potential Instagram picture. I see the world through my iPhone and/or Nikon camera, and therefor I don’t see the world as it is anymore. So two weeks ago I decided to take a blog/vlog/instagram break.

Quiting blogging & instagramming cold-turkey

Not being able to enjoy my life, even when being on a beautiful island with the love of my life, makes me feel ungrateful, spoiled, stupid and very sad. I’m leading the perfect Instagram life, what the F is wrong with me?! After another morning of crying I was so done with the inability to enjoy myself because I’m too busy on capturing my new Insta-hit, I stopped Instagramming, blogging and vlogging cold-turkey. I didn’t even leave you guys a little note. Sorry for that.

I can’t blame my sadness completely on the Instagram-pressure. It’s been a rough year with a lot of changes, including my father passing away. I just made a new start, which is awesome, yet this travel adventure is also scary and takes quite some getting used-to. All things that made life a bit harder. Never the less I do feel that the Instagram-pressure is what’s causing my inability to enjoy my life. Which became even clearer when I stopped Instagramming, blogging and vlogging.

The first few days I still had a lot of ‘This would be a cool Instagram shot!’ thoughts, yet it felt so nice to not grab my iPhone and spend 10 minutes taking pictures. It felt so nice to just spread my colourful Balinese sarong I just bought for a few Rupiah on one of the crappy, yet comfy beach-beds. It felt so nice to just look at the sea over my un-manicured toes. If I was still in my Instagram-mode I would have bought a trendy black and white sarong, I would have sat in an uncomfortable but stylish chair and I would have painted my nails, so they’d be picture-perfect. Instead I was just laying in the sun, watching children play, listening to the sound of the waves and finally feeling a bit of enjoyment inside of me. Apparently this is what I truly like.

Painful confessions

I had another moment of truth when we went to Potato Head Beach Club. A trendy beach club my inner-Instagrammer would love, yet the Lian I am at the moment didn’t actually like it that much. Yes, the place looked amazing and was so trendy that every picture I would take would be a hit on Instagram, but something felt off. The prices were too high, the people were too ‘look at me’, the vibe just wasn’t right. I realized I’d rather have a cheap Bintang beer with Rick at one of the crappy, but cute places at the beach. Apparently that’s what I truly like.

I remember when Rick moved in with me, I had a hard time replacing my minimalistic black chairs for his comfortable pink and purple chairs. There goes my Instagram-perfect black and white home… Now, after a few weeks in colorful Bali, I want my future home to look warm and cosy, with lots of wooden elements and turquoise as the main colour. Apparently that’s what I truly like.

And to add another painful confession to the story (one I couldn’t even confess to myself before): I buy clothes based on their Instagram potential. Of course I don’t buy everything that’s trendy. Those Gucci fur loafers? Yuk! No even if you gave them to me. But I painfully admit that next to the question ‘Will I be able to match this with other items I own?’, the question ‘Is this item Instagram-worthy?’ plays a big part in my to-buy-or-not-to-buy decision making.

How to keep your true self and your inner-instagrammer apart?

So apparently I go to places and buy things that have Instagram potential. I think in Instagram-likes in stead of doing and sharing what I really like. That’s not good, not good at all.

Now I realize that Instagram is part of my job and with every job come things you don’t always like. But since my Instagram (and my blog & vlog) is about my life, it should be filled with things I like. It’s going to be quite a challenge to separate the things my inner-Instagrammer likes with the things Lian likes, as the two are so entangled with each other after all these years. But I’m gonna try. Meaning my Instagram and blog won’t be as stylish as they look now. Or as I’m trying to make them look now 😉 I don’t want to share a great picture, I want to share a great moment.

Are you a blogger/instagrammer as well and do you recognize yourself in this story? Or do you know how to keep your true self and your inner-instagrammer apart? If so, please let me know how, as I find it very hard to do! Looking forward to reading your opinion about this all, even if you’re not a blogger/instagrammer!

What you need for a first date (and the story of my first date)

First about the one thing that caught your eye: the dress. I love this dress! Just perfect for the red carpet or a special date.

I must say I don’t quite look like this on my first date. I wore a casual black top and black jeans. I combined it with nude pumps that actually got stuck between two tiles on the way to the café we were going. My shoe stood there as I took a step with a bare foot, with Rick next to me. As I started to cuss, the ice was broken. Rick immediately knew what kind of girl he just met: A tomboy disguised in a female body. The contrast between the two would be even more extreme if I’d worn this female dress.

I think Rick would love this dress, even though he loves the fact that I’m more ‘one of the guys’ then a typical girl. During our second date I wore high heels and a skirt with an extreme slits (this skirt), and he was blown away. I believe that every man, whether he likes tough, sweet, spontaneous or shy girls, loves to see his lady in a female dress and high heeled shoes every now and then.

So, what do you need for a first date?

  • A perfect date-dress
  • Shoes that are tightened to your feet (!)
  • A full-battery phone in case you need your bestie to save you from a horrible date
  • Toothpicks to improve your chances of a first kiss
  • Mints to improve your chances of a second kiss
  • Deodorant to improve your chances period

It’s proven that sent is very important when it comes to first impressions. You might have sprayed yourself with Flowerbomb 10 times, sweaty smells will beat the Viktor & Rolf masterpiece right away. And believe me, you’re going to sweat. Even when you’re having the date in December. I choose NIVEA Invisible Black & White deodorant. It’s made especially to prevent yellow stains on white clothes and white stripes on black clothes. Can you imagine white stripes on this dress? The whole powervibe of this outfit would go down the drain immediately. No thank you?

Want to see the dress in action? Check out this video.

SELF PORTRAIT dress || ALDO shoes (via sarenza) || NIVEA Invisible Black & White deodorant || FABIENNE CHAPOT bag

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Tinder Tales II: A letter to Tinder

Dear Tinder,

I have joked about writing this letter a lot. But while laughing I was secretly not joking. I fought it for far too long and I feel that I have to do what I secretly wanted to do for months. Dear Tinder, I really want to tell you how thankful I am that you exist.

No, I don’t want to thank you for the fucks I’ve had thanks to you. I don’t want to thank you for the dates I’ve had thanks to you. I don’t even want to thank you for the epic Tinder Tuesday I had thanks to you. Even though that’s worth a ‘thank you’ as you can read here.

Tinder, I want to thank you for introducing me to my boyfriend. I want to say the love of my life, but it might be a bit too early to say that. Even though we already agreed we’re staying together until we have to change each others dentures in a retirement home. Sounds much more fun than ’till we die right?! That’s what we thought! It makes us laugh, which we do all the time as you can see on the photo I added. We have the same weird sense of humor. We also have the weird need to always be honest and talk everything out. Even though there’s not much to talk out, because we happen to always think a-like. So we mostly talk about other things, from silly things to serious things. And of course we talk dirty 😉

What I’m trying to say Tinder, is that I really appreciate you introducing me to love when I wasn’t even looking for it. I went in with an open mind and apparently an open heart, as it’s now filled with love. It’s not 100% full yet, my boyfriend is still breaking down my walls. But he says he will break them down until I’m not afraid to love him as much as he loves me. Isn’t that wonderful, Tinder?

Thank you from the bottom of my almost full heart.

All the best,

Lian Galliard.